Unpredictability

There are those mornings when we just don’t want to get out of the bed. We just want to keep lying there for as long as we can. Not because we are lazy, but because we know what is in store for the day. We anticipate the usual boring working day or even a weekend sometimes. And we feel, why not just avoid the routine and do something that might not actually irate us by the end of the day. Same old breakfast, same route, same work, lunch around same faces, coffee gossips with the usual ones, same gym, same door to open at the end of the day with the same key. Why can’t we just avoid all that for one day? And when that thought is being processed in our heads, we pinch ourselves and wake up. We know however much we think, we will end up doing it anyway. The usual routine. And that’s where the fun starts. We start the day just like yesterday. While things are going fine (rather not so fine – monotonous), suddenly we get a text or a call. From someone whom we haven’t met for ages or spoken for months. A voice from the other end questions, ‘Dinner tonight?’. And we are stumbled. Yes or No. There isn’t much time to think and we go with a Yes. What’s the harm after all in having a dinner with an old ‘special’ friend. And from that moment onwards until we enter the restaurant for dinner the only thought that goes in our mind is about the dinner and the friend with whom we are going to have it. We meet. After the typical greetings and whereabouts, there is a long silence. Only to be broken by, ‘So tell me, what’s new? Are you seeing someone?’. You fumble with a faint No. But that question brings down all the bitter and the sweet memories down the lane. Memories that were born when we were seeing someone. Seeing the person across the table. Or were hoping that it would ever happen. The entire discussion on the dinner table after that is without we being a part of it. We speak, but we don’t know what. We listen, but we don’t know to whom. We remember nothing. Probably just the good-bye while getting in the cab. Faintly. We open the door. This time it is not the same feeling that we have everyday. The same door with the same key feeling. We are still occupied. We wash our face. Change the clothes. Memories still keep flushing. For a moment we feel like putting a lock on our mind. Helplessly, we lie on the bed. Just before the eyes close, a thought occurs in our mind. Why didn’t I just lie on my bed in the morning? Why didn’t I just stay back home? We don’t know whether we should be happy that the routine had changed today or sad because probably we didn’t want it to change this way. And just then our eyes close with a hope, that when they open the next day it will all be a fresh start.

Smiles,

Swapnil..